Building a Financial Plan for Life’s Surprises (as a Team)

Life is unpredictable—job changes, medical issues, family needs, or emergencies can happen without warning. Curveballs like these don’t have to be stressful if you and your partner can work together and plan as a team. Here’s how to build a strong financial foundation that can weather nearly any storm without sacrificing your long-term goals.

Start With Honest Conversations

Before you can build a plan, you need to discuss your fears, goals, and financial habits. This isn’t just about sharing bank balances; it’s about understanding each other’s relationship with money.

Couples who openly discuss transparency, agreed-upon spending levels, and conflict resolution when rules are broken practice financial intimacy in real-time, according to Ed Coambs, a certified financial planner and licensed couple and family therapist. “This builds a foundation of trust that not only accelerates wealth-building but also strengthens the relationship itself,” he said. 

Planning for the unexpected is not straightforward—it’s a lifelong learning journey across all the major areas of personal finance, according to Coambs. It may include cash flow management, saving and investing for the future, strategies to address debt, appropriate insurance, estate planning, and education funding if children are involved. 

Open Communication and Financial Planning

Financial tools are only one part of the puzzle, and couples also need relational readiness, said Coambs. That looks like practicing emotional regulation when stressed, creating a shared “crisis playbook,” and identifying the ways financial trauma might manifest. For some, it may appear as withdrawing, over-controlling, or hiding expenses. 

“By intentionally cultivating financial intimacy alongside financial literacy, couples not only weather life’s curveballs but come out stronger and more connected,” Coambs said. Research has also found that when newlyweds prioritize their marriage, they communicate more positively about finances over time.

Continue With ‘What If’ 

One way to do so is by discussing “what if” scenarios. Talk through questions like what you would do if one partner lost their job, how you would handle a major medical bill, or what the plan would be if someone needed to take time off to care for a family member. 

Yes, these conversations might feel uncomfortable. And in a perfect world, you’d never need to deal with these. But preparing for the worst and expecting the best is the smart move here. And chats like these can reveal your shared values, individual priorities, and ultimately help you to identify weak spots and conflicts in your current financial picture as a couple. 

Building an Emergency Fund

Having a fully-funded emergency fund is one of the best lines of defense against financial surprises. Think of this as your dedicated financial safety net. Keep it in its own account, ideally a high-yield savings account where it’s accessible but still earning interest, separate from other savings and regular spending for the sole purpose of covering unexpected expenses. Your emergency fund provides a buffer that keeps you from dipping into retirement funds or taking on high-interest debt to cover surprise expenses. 

The generic rule of thumb is to have three to six months’ worth of essential living expenses set aside in an emergency fund. Remember that essentials include things like rent, utilities, groceries, and debt repayment. Investopedia’s research has found that in 2025, six months of emergency expenses equal approximately 40% of the average American annual household income, totaling around $35,000. This includes the cost of six months of housing, utilities, food, medical care, and car payments for an average U.S. household of at least two people. 

If you or your partner works in an unstable industry, you may want to go even higher or allocate more. The same goes for if you live in a more expensive area. You can calculate your personalized emergency fund goal by considering the average, too. The U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics found that average spending by U.S. metro area ranged from $110,886 in San Francisco to $71,378 in Miami. The average annual household expenditure across the country was $75,172.

The Federal Reserve’s report on the economic well-being of U.S. households in 2024 found that 63% of adults said they could cover a hypothetical $400 unexpected expense by using cash, savings, or a credit card paid off at the next statement. And 30% of adults said they couldn’t cover three months of expenses by any means. You want to be part of that majority, not the minority. 

Of course, it’s also common for couples to have uneven income or obligations. Consider making proportional contributions to build up a shared emergency fund. Set a fixed goal and stick to it, and work together for something fair and sustainable. 

Protecting With Insurance

Having insurance is a crucial part of ensuring your financial safety net is strong, as it can cover costs that an emergency fund alone may not.

Health insurance is key, as a major illness or injury could lead to medical and hospital bills that set you back hundreds or even thousands of dollars. If you’re married, consider getting on one plan. Either way, make sure you both carefully review your deductibles and out-of-pocket maximums to select the best option for you. 

Don’t let insurance give you a false sense of security. Although over 90% of Americans have some form of health insurance, nearly one in 12 adults still owes medical debt, which is why that emergency fund is listed first. 

Many employers offer short-term or long-term disability coverage, but it’s essential to understand the details and consider supplementing with an individual policy if needed. 

Homeowners’ and renters’ insurance, as well as auto insurance, are important to have, as they can cover repairs or replace your home, belongings, or vehicles, and protect you if you’re ever found liable for an accident.

Need another reason to prioritize insurance? Research from the Sycamore Institute has found that those with medical debt are more likely to have medical issues like high blood pressure. Although it makes sense that people with health needs also require more care and likely incur higher medical bills, the research suggests that the medical debt itself can also impact health.

Flexible Budgeting and Debt Management

If your budget doesn’t allow for some room for unexpected expenses, it’s bound to fail at some point. Even though you should definitely have an emergency fund, creating a flexible budgeting plan can give you more wiggle room. 

Create a line item or category for surprise expenses. If you don’t use the money that month, roll it into your emergency fund or other savings. Surprises like an unexpected car repair or last-minute flight for a family emergency can be covered without stress. Baking this into your budget also takes some of the pressure off of deciding what comes out of your emergency fund, as you’ve already accounted for minor shocks. 

Another topic you’ll specifically talk about with your partner is how you’ll handle debt if one of you loses a job to prevent mispayments that could hurt your credit score. Sit down and determine which payments you would like to prioritize, focusing on essentials such as your car, home, and any credit cards or loans. 

Lenders might be willing to work with you if you’re facing financial hardship by offering things like temporary forbearance or reduced payment plans. The National Foundation for Credit Counseling is a non-profit that offers support to help you figure out a debt management plan. 

Planning for Career or Family Surprises

You’ll also want to plan for family and career surprises like caregiving, job relocation, or, again, unexpected job loss. 

For work, you’ll need to have a plan for how you’ll cover living expenses, health insurance, and other bills. Plus, a plan for your job search. Talking about this before you’re in a position where you have to talk about it sets you up for success. 

Family surprises like caring for a new baby or an aging parent might force one partner to step back from or stop working. Make sure to chat about how this would impact your finances, including your retirement contributions, and how you would divide up responsibilities. Caregiving not only results in lost wages but also a slew of other financial consequences to consider, like diminished savings and unpredictable long-term care costs. 

If one partner is offered a new job that requires relocation, there are a lot of financial implications and questions you’ll want to consider. If one of you is offered a role that requires moving, what would need to happen for that to make financial sense? The cost of moving is only one part of the puzzle; there’s also the new cost of living to think about, which includes things like taxes. 

Keeping the Plan Current

Your financial plan is a living, breathing document, not a one-time event. The best way to make the most of it is to keep it as up-to-date as possible. Life changes, things happen, and the quicker you can adapt, the better. 

Schedule a yearly financial review as a couple to review this plan and identify any areas that may need adjustment. You’ll want to check in on things like whether your emergency fund is still sufficient and if your insurance coverage needs have changed. Other topics worth discussing might include reviewing your investment performance or updating your beneficiaries. Heck, you might even want to touch base on how often you review this plan. 

Of course, you should always update this plan in the moment as new financial goals or challenges emerge, or major life events like getting married or buying a home. 

Having tools that let you stay organized is also a great way to keep your plans up to date. Some couples might prefer shared spreadsheets, while others like working in shared budgeting apps like Honeydue and YNAB. 

The Bottom Line

It’s impossible to avoid all life’s surprises, but having a financial plan in place to handle them with less stress is always a good idea. Weathering any storm together requires a proactive approach to protect your finances, which can also deepen your relationship as a couple. 

Communicating with your partner can turn individual financial habits into a shared vision. Pairing this with a robust emergency fund, comprehensive insurance, and a flexible budget creates a powerful defense against the unexpected.